“We specifically cater for the mature Muslim community, to facilitate this we must mandate that all users conduct themselves in a mature, dignified & Islamic manner”
We, at Mature Muslim Matrimony.com are dedicated to providing a bespoke and reliable service for our members. We want each and every user to get the very best experience from their membership. However to achieve this we need our members to display certain etiquettes. Some of these etiquettes are listed below and form The Mature Muslim Matrimony Code of Conduct:
The MMM site & service is catered for a specific demographic. We purposely want to limit the user base in order to enhance the user experience for our members and so that we can direct our time and energy to helping the existing members.
Users who are over 30 years old, are divorced, are separated and / or are with children are welcomed to be a part of our service. Anyone who is not from the above categories we would request not subscribe with us unless they are willing to marry from the categories listed above. MMM want to ensure that expectations are correctly set and we request all users respect this and each other.
If you feel someone is not for you then be direct and just say, thank the person for the interest and move on. Likewise if someone has expressed that you are not the one then thank them and move on.
Always be honest in all your communications with others members. Always list the points which make you unique and also ones which you feel you need improving on. If anything this whole process should make you a better person in-Sha-Allah.
‘Abdullah reported Allah’s Messenger (ﷺ) as saying: It is obligatory for you to tell the truth, for truth leads to virtue and virtue leads to Paradise, and the man who continues to speak the truth and endeavors to tell the truth is eventually recorded as truthful with Allah, and beware of telling of a lie for telling of a lie leads to obscenity and obscenity leads to Hell-Fire, and the person who keeps telling lies and endeavors to tell a lie is recorded as a liar with Allah.
MMM mandate honesty is maintained throughout the entire process. Honesty and goodness can only lead to goodness. We truly want to break taboos and all the bad practices which unfortunately exist today in the marriage process. Too often the marriage process is akin to selling a car, where we can become a little creative with the good points and simply fail to list the points which may need improving on.
Keep your expectations real and Islamic
Unfortunately sometimes we find that our expectations are too high or completely unreal somewhat. We are all guilty of this but it is our responsibility to ensure that our expectations are realistic and based on the Quran & Sunnah.
Abu Hurairah (May Allah be pleased with him) reported:
The Prophet (ﷺ) said, “A woman is married for four things: for her wealth, for her lineage, for her beauty or for her piety. Select the pious, may you be blessed!”
As the above hadith demonstrates the fact that a marriage based on goodness, religiousness and honesty will always be better for a believer.
MMM always advises that one must always look for more than height, weight, looks, salary for when we are searching doe a spouse. Always look for the one who will help you fulfil your deen and the one who will make the best parent to your children. Ameen.
Always show respect
Narrated AbuHurayrah:The Prophet (ﷺ) said: The most perfect believer in respect of faith is he who is best of them in manners.
Politeness and good manners is necessary in dealing with other people. When dealing with potential or future spouse it is paramount. Please try to show respect in all our dealings with other people on MMM. #
We also need to show empathy and sympathy to the feelings of others. We are all unique as individuals and are unlikely to have the same viewpoints as each other, please respect each other’s opinions even when you disagree.
Manage your messages
Always ensure your reply to all your messages even if you feel that the person who contacted you is not the one. Remember someone has taken the time to contact you please be considerate and take the time to respond. What’s more if someone has decided that you are not the one for them, thank them and move on.
Never use offensive or ill-mannered language
There is no place on MMM for disrespectful or offensive behaviour. MMM reserves the right to suspend anyone who it is deemed of using unpleasant, obscene or aggressive language. Please remember that it is your responsibility to report to us any member who is not conducting themselves in an Islamic or ethical manner. Do rest assured that any reports can be made in total confidence.
Be able to make a decision
At MMM we committed to helping mature single Muslims get married and stay married. Being a part of this site & service there are a number of factors which we are assuming to be true. One such factor is that every member should be in a position to make the decision and get married should the right person be found.
Too often we find members procrastinate when a potential spouse is found. This can be very frustrating for all involved. MMM definitely recommends that you take your time in your search; do dua & salat-e-istikhara, always enlist the help of friends, family, wali etc. However MMM also recommends that once you are happy that you are right for each other you are able to commit to marriage.
Hasan bin ‘Ali (May Allah be pleased with them) said:
I remember (these words) from Messenger of Allah (ﷺ): “Give up what is doubtful to you for that which is not doubtful; for truth is peace of mind and falsehood is doubt”.
Always involve your Wali / Mehram
MMM advises sisters always ensure that the mehram/wali/guardian is involved during the search process. A mehram/wali can often give you the guidance and wisdom which an individual often overlooks.
Abu Musa narrated that: the Messenger of Allah said: “There is no marriage except with a Wali.”